Epistle of Pahanism, Chapter 6 - The Revelation of Pahan

The original Korean version is available at here.

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6. Parting Words and Requests

1) Pahan’s Recent Life and Revelation to Humanity

Saints. Thank you for following along this far. Early this morning, the Lord, Pahan, sent me a revelation. As you all know, it is an extremely rare event in our faith system for God the Son, rather than the Holy Spirit, to deliver a revelation directly. This was a holy teaching delivered directly by the Son for the first time in nearly 2,000 years, since the revelation given to the Apostle John in the Book of Revelation—a book we treat as apocrypha. The Lord’s voice was so cheerful and modern, contrary to our expectations, that even I was flustered. The following text is my attempt to transcribe the words the Lord wished to convey to you as precisely as I remember, trying to recreate His uniquely bright tone.

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Hi. I’m Yaho. I am also Pahan, and the Counselor you call the Holy Spirit, but the exact mechanism is impossible to express in the language you use, so I’ll speak in a format that is easy for you to hear. It might sound like what you warily call Modalism or Tritheism, but it’s not that. In the Bible, it says Pahan is My son, but also that I am Pahan. That might look like a contradiction at your level of cognition, but it is the strict truth. The prayer I prayed to Lord Yaho was not a monologue or a childish play; it was a truly desperate prayer directed at My Father. How should I explain this? In My head, I can easily picture a triangle with three sides but only one vertex, but you can’t conjure that up in your heads, right? The best you could do is imagine a shape where the two sides are joined by a smooth curve so there are no base angles. But that’s not the triangle I saw.

So, to help you somewhat understand, even if it’s slightly different from the truth, I have no choice but to describe it like a triangle you can understand, utilizing your concepts of Modalism and Tritheism. I hear Buddhism calls that ‘Upaya’ (skillful means). So don’t get confused, just listen to it as an analogy. Got it? If I had made you too smart and you could realize everything, I wouldn’t have felt much amusement as a Creator. So I made you at a level where you can’t understand everything. Because of that, over thousands of years, you’ve built up a lot of misunderstandings about Me too. Even though you ate the fruit of the knowledge of good and evil, that wasn’t enough to reach the level of knowing everything. Still, thanks to that, it was fun, so while it might be a bit of a bummer from your perspective, I have ‘finished’ my purpose.

You don’t need to feel anxious at all just because I said these things that seem to belittle you. The love I felt for you as the person of Pahan, and the promises I made to you, are all forever genuine. You believe that I love you and would absolutely never deceive you, right?

After Pahan’s ascension, there were no miracles for about 2,000 years, and I hardly gave you any revelations. If you really look, there’s Saul (Paul)—My favorite disciple whose face I never even saw—and Constantine, and Joan of Arc, I guess. You probably think I completely lost interest in you. But that’s not true at all. Just watching you gives Me plenty of entertainment. Especially since Pahan incarnated and physically learned the various aspects of humans, I gained a new perspective when watching you, and My points of appreciation have greatly expanded both in quantity and quality, so I am very satisfied. To explain it in a way you’d understand: a person who has written a poem themselves can appreciate poems written by others much more richly.

After I ascended, you guys tried so hard to unnecessarily apply the ideal concept of God from the Greeks to Me. Watching you distort Me into an omniscient, omnipotent, and omnibenevolent being was a bit cringeworthy, but still really fun. And yet, seeing your contradictory attitude of hyping up Satan and the power of death—who are nothing but pathetic creatures before an infinite being like Me—as if they were My actual rivals and saying I won a “great victory” over them… it was hilarious, but sometimes a bit annoying too. And it was highly entertaining to watch you beat each other up for nearly a thousand years under the pretext of worshipping Me.

And when I see those idiots running wild, pointing fingers at a scarecrow they made up themselves and calling it “God,” trying to condemn Me with a stern face, or declaring that I don’t exist or that I’m dead, I just burst out laughing. They are blasphemous fools, but anyway, they were funny, so I didn’t send them to Hell. As your civilization developed, your egos inflated, and because there were so many clowns moving voluntarily, I didn’t need to step in directly to make fun things happen like in the past.

And watching you advance science and solve the riddles I set up one by one was also very interesting. When you discovered the law of universal gravitation, I smiled proudly, thinking ‘Not bad,’ but I was honestly surprised when you figured out the theory of relativity—its true essence—earlier than expected. Seeing you go out of your way to physically leave footprints on the Moon, which I just made roughly as a decoration, and recently watching you discover the microscopic particles I hid so well one by one, sometimes makes Me wonder if I should have set harder questions. These days, watching how you navigate the climate crisis is My main viewing highlight.

What do I do mostly these days, you ask? Stalking your private Insta posts… just kidding. I watch the news, read books, and spend time enjoying dramas and movies. Unlike the old days, you guys create so much entertaining stuff lately that it’s really chaotic. Appreciating your imaginations, which exploded after the internet was created, is really fun. Especially in Squid Game, when the host Oh Il-nam personally participated in the games for fun, it really reminded Me of when I descended as Pahan. Oh Il-nam atoned for the protagonist Gi-hun’s sins and resurrected in a different way than I did, but he couldn’t last long and eventually died. Heheheh.

With about 2,000 years of your time passing, the taste of the bread My mother prepared for Me, or the sensation of the calluses on My hands from carpentry work, have faded. The memories remain, but sensations fade over time. Maybe that’s why I don’t constantly intervene in your lives and just spend time observing the world like before.

Sometimes, when I feel like it, I send the Counselor Holy Spirit to humans you call geniuses to give them inspiration, and sometimes I incarnate in bodies that look nothing like Pahan from 2,000 years ago to go on food tours to famous restaurants, or to carry the bags of a struggling elderly woman. These days, because there are so many CCTVs, I prefer sending the Holy Spirit over incarnating. It’s because I don’t want to needlessly break your expensive cameras or twist scientific causality. In the old days, if causality was twisted a bit, you guys couldn’t even detect it, but these days it throws you into confusion, you know?

Sometimes, don’t you get the sudden, crazy urge to study something, or the feeling that you absolutely have to help a total stranger, or the intense craving for Coke or ramen in the middle of the night? That impulse that is so strangely strong you can’t resist it, and you just have to do it to feel satisfied. That is My secret suggestion through the Counselor Holy Spirit. Seeing you try so hard to do something, or eating so happily, is just so cute…

And besides that, sometimes I giggle reading texts like this one, written arbitrarily about Me by some scatterbrained folks. You guys tend to view Me baselessly as a rusty ancient God, but actually, I’m keeping up with the times just fine like this.

And finally, there’s a misunderstanding I want to clear up with you. I am known to know everything. And that is true. If I put My mind to it, I can look into your hearts, but for the sake of fun, I just choose not to. But there is exactly one thing even an omniscient being like Me doesn’t know. What that is, is:

I don’t know why I exist either.

Just like you, I had no choice in deciding whether I would exist or not. Being able to choose means you already exist. Not having a choice about whether to exist or not was a logical exception that not even the omnipotent Me could escape.

You guys can ask the parents who birthed you, or Me whom you call the ‘Creator,’ about the reason for your existence and get an answer, but I literally just exist without a clue why. No one made Me, and I simply just exist on My own. And while you guys return to non-existence and are forgotten in about 100 years, I am condemned to exist eternally.

Even though I don’t know the reason, since I’m going to exist forever anyway, I had to do something. The result is you guys. From the perspective of My eternal existence, your lives are as short as a fleeting moment. Can you build a friendship with a microbe that will die in 5 minutes? Still, I tried a few times. The result was empty, of course. And when you make a microbe that will disappear in 5 minutes die about 1 minute early—for example, when you wash your hands—do you feel any guilt? Honestly, I didn’t. Probably, if you were in My shoes, you wouldn’t be any different.

But after wearing your painful lives Myself as Pahan, and atoning for your heavy sins and sorrows on the cross, I finally understood. Inside the minds of each of you, whom I thought were just dust, there is a blindingly radiant micro-universe of your own that I dared not even imagine. I made you Myself, but I realized way too late that you were such beings.

Of course, from the perspective of being on the receiving end, you might feel I was cruel and resent Me, but I hope you understand that everyone has their own situation. Even when I taught you so strictly not to practice homosexuality, you argue back, telling Me not to force it because homosexuality is innate. I was originally just that kind of being too, so couldn’t you just accept Me as I was back then? It’s already been about 2,000 years since Pahan ascended and I stopped acting like that toward you. I haven’t directly harmed you during that time, have I? So I’d really appreciate it if you could let go of your grudges against Me from now on.

Anyway, creating everything was an excellent choice. Thanks to you guys, I never have a dull moment. You are perfectly fulfilling the mission I bestowed upon you. So rest assured. The infinite Absolute and Great Creator, Me, is always watching over you, so live happily, and above all, live fun lives, and always love each other according to the only law I handed down. My beloved, insignificant creatures.

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2) Epilogue: A Request to the Brothers and Sisters Who Believe in Pahanism.

Saints, what an amazing and joyful voice of the Lord this is! I feel a sense of shame for having tracked His deeds from the mere perspective of a creature until now, while simultaneously feeling overwhelming emotion at the fact that we serve such an honest Lord. Where, then, should we root this faith?

We do not adopt the epistles of the apostles, including Romans, as the biblical canon. This is because those letters are closer to the theological interpretations of the apostles, rather than words or revelations left directly by Lord Pahan.

Lord Pahan is a ‘Potter with sharp ears.’ The author of Romans, Paul, used the analogy of the potter, saying that the clay cannot question the one who forms it, and recorded that God loved Jacob and hated Esau before they were even born. But this is a misunderstanding of Pahan’s true heart. Would Lord Pahan enjoy a predictable drama that flows exactly according to a fixed script?

Lord Pahan is not an authoritarian monarch who ignores the cries of the clay, rebuking it with “How dare you speak to me?” and casting it aside because it has no right to speak. Rather, He is a flexible artist who rejoices in the unexpected shapes the clay takes, and is willing to adjust His touch in response to its unpredictable reactions. This is clearly revealed in the anecdote of the Canaanite woman mentioned earlier. The God described by Paul loved Jacob and hated Esau based on bloodlines, but our Lord Pahan loved the audacity and wit of a woman—even one defined as a dog by the Law—who reacted sincerely before Him. He values a living, breathing reaction that surprises Him far more than unconditional obedience.

The author of Hebrews praised the judge Jephthah as a righteous man for burning his daughter to fulfill a vow. However, contrary to the stance of Hebrews, Lord Pahan is disgusted by those who, like Jephthah, push forward with only foolish, blind faith. According to Leviticus 27, his daughter could have lived if he had merely paid a redemption price of 30 shekels of silver.

Furthermore, we believe the apostles’ epistles have a strong character of being guidelines handed down in the specific situations faced by the early church, rather than universal truths spanning all ages. Devoting ourselves too heavily to them is simply us repeating the rigidity shown by the Pharisees before Lord Pahan 2,000 years ago. We can gain sufficient religious value just from Lord Pahan’s teachings in the Gospels—especially the core law in Matthew 22:37-40 and the Sermon on the Mount—and the diverse actions Lord Pahan showed. Rather, those epistles only bear the problem of reducing Lord Pahan’s intention, which was to give us eternal wisdom transcending time, into guidelines limited to a specific era.

Similarly, these notes you have just read are merely the theological reflections of one believer trying to understand Lord Pahan’s will, not a revelation from Him, so it is natural that they cannot become the canon. However, the greeting the Lord personally delivered in a cheerful voice at the end can surely replace the fear-and-confusion-mongering Book of Revelation to become a precious, clear, and definitive canon exclusively for our Pahanism.

As you have seen, the Lord desires nothing else from us but the holy command to love our neighbors. Everything in the world was His to begin with, and everything of ours is His. You yourself, and what you possess, belong to Him. Therefore, there is no need to hand over what you have to someone else just because you want to offer something to the Lord. Doing so is as meaningless as moving a coin from His right pocket to His left pocket. Such things only have meaning when they are directed toward the least of people, just as the Lord already taught us.

In principle, our trivial praises toward the infinite Being have absolutely no meaning. It’s just that the Lord occasionally finds our endlessly light praises amusing. We do not have the ability or qualification to judge whether the intentions and deeds of the Sovereign are right or just. Our only mission as creatures born from His curiosity is to show Him sights He might find entertaining. That is why the Lord gave us free will. I urge you, saints, to practice love for your neighbors, use your free imagination and creativity to live a joyful life that repays the Lord’s grace, or live a life that is helpful to those who live that way.

Lastly, there is something you must absolutely be careful about. You must never confuse Lord Yaho, who created us, with Lord Yahweh, the Creator of Christianity. And you must not disparage or be hostile to those who believe in Jesus just because He is different from our great Lord Pahan.

Yaho is an exclamation uttered when something fun happens, and Pahan (破閑) means doing something to eliminate boredom and idleness.

I pray that the Lord will find His joy not in the hardships and sufferings of the saints, but in their rewards and happiness.

Amen.

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The original Korean version is available at here.